"Al-Qaeda snow plot!"

In a 'This Might be Satire' exclusive it has been revealed after extensive undercover made up investigations that Al-Qaeda is working on a major plot to disrupt mainland Britain.
They plan to do this with a powerful harmful new and deadly substance.
It's name is simple, snow.

After having forced a downfall over the UK in early February, we understand that Al-Qaeda operatives are now planning to unleash a full snow flurry in the hopes of disabling the day-to-day running of the UK and cause utter chaos.
People are advised that 'snow' is white, cold to the touch and great for sledging on.
Avoid at all costs, unless engaging in a snowball fight.
The Government had no comment on this made up story.
Critics are blaming everyone.

Announcement

This Might be Satire is currently on a sabbatical, mourning the loss of the US President George W Bush. We shall return soon. When we sober up.

Winner of Melchett Award announced!

This Might be Satire is pleased to announce the new winner of our just made up a minute ago monthly award:

"The General Sir Anthony Cecil Hogmanay Melchett total pig-headed unwillingness to look facts in the face whilst keeping a sunny disposition award" goes to...

Prime Minister Tony Blair!

This award showcases his continued naivety -calling for a ceasefire when he knows full well they won't be one- and his simplistic optimism in his recent answers with regard to the Israeli/Lebanon conflict. Below are some of his recent utterings that won him the day.

"We have to speed this entire process up, get a resolution now, and on the passing an agreement of that resolution, then the hostilities have got to stop, and stop on all sides."

And that:

"There is no basis for hostilities to continue" whilst describing the recent bombing of Qana as an "absolutely tragic situation".

Also, that the death of 54 civilians, mostly children, at Qana had,
"changed things".

For these gems and more, we are pleased to award PM Blair this award.
Well done Prime Minster!

PM Blair in Beirut recently.

"Tally-Ho! Let's get that ceasefire on eh chaps?"

New Israeli Defense Minister

Israel unveiled its new Defense Minsister today, Jim Malone.
When asked how to defeat and perhaps end the current conflict with Hizbollah the Mr Malone said:

"Here's how, they pull a knife, we pull a gun. They send one of yours to the hospital, we send one of his to the morgue. That's the Chicago way, and now it's the Israeli way! Are you ready to do that? ARE YOU?!"

Hizbollah's new head of command, a Mr Allah Capone, was unavailable for comment.

Israeli Election 2006

The Israeli election results are in.
The turnout was low and no outright winner was declared.
Out of the following political groups:
'Palestinians die die die party'
'Palestinny-what-now coalition'
'The Arabs have got no chance group'
None of these parties had enough votes to win by clear majority so a coaltion out of all the parties has been formed and will declare a government soon.
When it does the new coaltion government will henceforth be known as:
'Doesn't matter who gets in, left right centre, Palestinians future? = f*&%$#d! coaltion party.'

Satire awards Mail writer

Congrats to Daily Mail writer Melanie Phillips!
The columnist has just scooped This Might Be Satire's one and only award for her outstanding and imaginative oratory skills.
That being the ability to talk so exclusively out of her arse.
The columnist was up against some fierce competition, Richard Littlejohn, Tony Blair, the Sun newspaper but her complete lack of irony, wit and compassion in her narrow minded ravings, won her the day.
Well done Melanie!

I could have written a story!

A 'This might be Satire' reporter with an actual factual worthwhile story gained easy access to The Sun's Editorial offices today and could have had a story printed right under their very noses.
Our intrepid man, known as The Smartarse, strolled unchallenged in and around the 'news' building in London for TEN YEARS simply by posing as a journalist.
And unfortunately by posing as such, his cover was easily blown.
When our reporter asked about researching a newsworthy event such as the recent deaths and arresting of student protestors in Ethiopia the jig was up.
A enquiry has been ordered by The Sun's top brass into the mishap of real news content infiltrating their offices. For the follow up report extra large crayons and bibs have been ordered.